Does The Man Or Woman Do The Most Work In Bed?

I want to get your perspective on this. Who do you think puts in the most work?There is not one answer to this because it all depends on what you are doing between the sheets. If a couple is prone to just doing the missionary position I would probably say the man is doing most of the work,even though a woman can be very active in that position. I have had conversations with many men who feel that they are doing most of the work in that position because a lot (not all) women tend to just lay there.

On the flip side (no pun intended) if the woman is on top most time in a cowgirl or reverse cowgirl position she is more prone to be doing most of the work, even though a man can be very active from the bottom as well.

Of course there are many other positions and fetishes that can be done in bed, it just depends on what you are doing in bed and what you are into to determine the balance of the workload.

Lastly, the work can extend outside of the bed in creating an ambiance for if you are into any role-play activities; if so you may want to keep that in mind as well when you are having this debate. Some situations can take a lot of thought, time, and effort.

At the end of day you both should be concerned on pleasing each other rather than being concerned with who is doing most of the work.

ASSume Everything When Dealing With A Man!

I just read a tweet by comedian Kevin Hart that said if a man licks a woman's asshole, he's in love. Why did this little line of 'knowledge' strike my intellect? You should already know from reading some of my previous blogs, where my mind lives most of the damn time.
I've had one person, I think, to lick my ass. It scared the hell out of me because I had never had it done. I knew he was a freak and I knew he was kinda digging me, but damn, the ass licking. When it happened, it happened! I was shocked, amazed, cautious, and turned on all at the same damn time. The gentleman had skills, girls....yes he did. Afterwords, I thought..did he just lick my ass? Yes, he did just lick my ass and licked it good. It was so out of the ordinary for our usual 'sex games' we played that I would often find myself from time to time thinking about that shit. We never spoke on it. I cant remember if he ever asked me if I liked it, I'm thinking he did? But, the most strangest thing about is was that I often wondered why he did it. I knew he was a freak...extreme freak. And I loved it! But damn, ass-licking? Like I said, I knew he was digging me in a deep way and I was into him also. At the time the ass encounter occured, I knew there was nothing we wouldn't do for each other. But his tongue having direct contact with my asshole was amazing and mind-blowing. It was almost like he was saying,'Baby, if I'll go as far as to lick your ass, I'll stand by you and be there for you no matter what.' And I knew this was something he hadn't done more than twice because we never did it again. And trust, we did everything when it came to fucking. I mean EVERYTHING!!
I hadn't thought about it in years until I read the tweet. So,women, do you think it's true? Men, what about you? Would you guys actually lick the ass of a woman you were so into that you would go above and beyond pleasing her in every way? At the time I didn't know what I had. I'd hit the jackpot of love and barely recognized it. Although I knew he loved me and was definitely in love with me, I never knew it went that deep, and his tongue either. LOL
Now, I sit here and all I can think about is that tongue lashing my ass got that night! Damn, I need to call him. Wait. I'm in a relationship. But...oh well, squash that! I don't cheat on my men. But one fuck up on my 6'8er's part, and I'm returning to my passionate tongue flicker. Would it be that easy? You'd better believe it would. I talk to him at least 3 times a week and we have a history. A history and a love that I don't think I could ever find with another man in this life time.
Oooooh, Lawd....thank God for Twitter and Kevin Hart!! #thatisall

In My Dreams

I had a dream last night. No, just any dream. This was about a certain ex of mine. Yes! We've had a lot of good times in the past and I was deeply in love with him. Our sex was intense..off the chain. No other man has ever made me feel like he did, sexually. In my dreams, it was he and I just kicking it and having a good time. Then we started having a discussion about the past. He remembered how I use to 'do' him. Usually, when out conversations come to this point, I am ready to scream and slap the shit out him. But, in my dream, we continued with it. Memories can fuck a person up! Especially if you're on good terms with the person who helped create those memories.
Anyway, we talked and laughed and drank some more. The one particular thing about us is that we both know where to go with each other to get better results. Honestly! And of course, he's younger than I am. That's my flavor!! A young, viril, big-dicked, muscle bound, cute paper-sack brown/light-skinned young buck who can fuck me long time, make my legs shake and cause me to have multiple orgasms that could compete with the most powerful volcano in Hawaii!! He did all that!! As the dream went on, I could feel myself getting wetter and wetter. I licked my lips and thought about how I missed giving him head!! His dick was 10 inches strong and when I met him, I could tell that little girls he had been involved with hadn't done the work they should have!! A damn shame. My dick sucking techniques as well as my sex altogether is better than any twenty-something little girl could ever master. To me, sex is business....and I'm always about my business!!
We kissed and hugged each other, knowing where this was going. I began to moan and lick his ear. I caressed his chest, the way he liked it to be done. See, with us, he knew what turned me on and I knew what turned him on. We were always in tune with one another's body. And if not, we would talk about it and then perfect the situation! LOL.
As our foreplay grew more intense, his dick got harder. Let me just say, at 43, I have seen many a dicks, but his, when I first layed eyes on that speciman, it was glorious and I loved the way he blessed me with it over and over again. I anticipated the multiple orgasms I would have with him and and the way he would breathe down my neck as he hit it from the back. No other man has ever been as gentle with me when it came to good love-making. I consider he and I both sexual artists. Anyway, the session came to an end, with promises of a few more. Our deep love for one another will never die. It's unspoken, but our hearts will never let it go. He knows and I know. See, when we have sex sessions, it's not just about fucking; it's about the love we shared, the laughs, the late night talks....everything in a nutshell. Almost like the 'total package'. You only get one or two special ppl in your life when it comes to love. Don't let anybody fool you with this knowledge. There will neer be 5 or 6 and beyond special men in my life. When I love, I love hard and I was most definitely bonafide in love with him, probably always will be, a little bit. But, there's nothing wrong with that, nothing!! Whenever I start missing him and what we had sexually, mentally, and emotionally, I know I can search for him in my dreams and he'll be there. Faithfully. No one can take that from either of us.

Fantasia - Truth Is

This song echoes my feelings for three very important men in my life over the years...one being my best-friend from the previous blog. I never knew what I had until it was gone!! More to come from Part II of A Love Lost...Maybe in the near future! Enjoy the video and the trip down memory lane, yall!!

A Love Lost....Maybe

Had a phone call from an old friend/lover today. It was quite surprising, but very interesting. He and I met 5 years ago in the month of May as a matter of fact in Memphis, Tn at Ryan's on Riverdale. I was leaving another guy's house, decided to stop and grab a bite to eat and the rest, as the say, is history. I loved his 'swag' from the first time I watched him walk as he approached my table. Did I think he wascoming to strike up a conversation? No way!! He smiled as he approached me and said, "How are you doing Ms. Lady? Are you eating alone, and if so, why does your man allow that?" I told him I had no man and was actually bringing closure to a relationship that had long since been over. TMI? I know, I know. Anyway, we started getting acquainted as much as we could over our buffet meal. We ended up exchanging numbers with me thinking nothing was gonna come of this because I knew for myself that I had not made such a great impression and was really, honestly trying not to. I had had it with Memphis men, although they are my 'flavor'.
I drove the 68 mile trek home, kinda, sorta thinking about my new admirer and wanting not to remember a sour past with the other guy. As I made it safely across the bridge, I instantly went back into my old routine of getting my life back in order; making sure my one-year old was well taken care of while I was gone, as well as, checking on my 3 year old's well-being. I settled down on my sofa and began grading papers and getting lesson plan together for the next week. Being a high-schol special education teacher is no joke!! So much paperwork! Almost to the minute I put away my finished 'project', my cell rings. It was him! I couldn't believe this man had actually called. He was sweet, with a slow, southern drawl and very well versed in seducing a woman. We became very good friends that night and never looked back since. That is until. I decided to get back in touch with the my daughter's father. After two years, my friend knew EVERYTHING that had transpired between me and my 'babydaddy' in Memphis. In fact, he knows so much, he can write the damn biography I will eventually pen! After tell him about my wanting my one-year old daugher to know her father, he flew through the roof and ranted and raved about how could I even contemplate letting that fool back into my life after the bullshit he had done. All the lies, all the many, many nights I had spent crying about him to my best-friend, which was this new guy. I felt bad, but I thought he of all people would
understand that you just can't fall in love with someone and simply walk away...no matter what that person does/did to you. He knew how I felt about my ex and that I needed closure. He refused to understand and the shit hit the fan. As a result, I lost my best-friend, my lover, my condidant, my ally. He was all that to me. Wesupposted each other, through thick and thin. I couldn't understand why he was getting so damn bent out of shape about an issue he knew was inevitable. I had listened to his entire love life and never turned my back on him when he made decisions I thought were bad ones or dated trifling ass Memphis chicks who didn't want anything out of life, including a productive man with a good ass Fed-Ex job!! They couldn't see his value as a person, as a man, as a Black man. I did. Always had. Regardless, I was there for him; like I thought he should have been there for me. Yes, we were lovers..had been intimate on a few occasions, but we were best-friends first. He left me, turned his back on me. He said I had made the most stupidest mistake I could have ever made. He actually questioned my 4.0gpa in college. LOL! That was 2007. We tried to hold on to our friendship..what was left of it anyway. Our conversations were less and less. I missed talking to him on the phone all night until we both snored in the other's ear. I missed him coming to see me or me going to Memphis to see him...just because. But, I stuck to my guns when it came to my daughter's happiness. I think at first, I even started resenting my 'babydaddy' for being back in my in my life, and the man I wanted there left due to his being in my life again. I was going through pure hell.
My best-friend and I even had sex one more time in 2008. Nothing. It didn't help matters any. In fact, it only made me feel worse. I even told my 'babydaddy' about it. Of course, him being a trifling nigger and trying to get something out of the new found 'relationship' between he and I, only shrugged his shoulders and said, "fuck that nigga. He can't stop me from seeing you or my baby." Typical. I had really fucked up this time. Things got really bad between us. My female associates in my hometown got involved, because I, being an arrogant ass, introduced him to two of them....letting him know that he could not do this to me and he could move the fuck on. Both females told me it wouldn't work between he and they because all he ever did was talk about me to them. I didn't know it was that deep. Honestly!! I found out through them that my best-friend, my lover, my daughter's god-father, my confidant, my ace-boon coon was in love with me.